Facebook Saves the Day!

I, like many, have wondered if I spend too much time writing in my blog, checking my email, checking other people's blogs and looking at random things on facebook. I mean really, what did I do in my spare time before facebook? Heck, how did we communicate before email and how did we find phone numbers or random bits of news/ trivia/ or questionable medical advice before internet?

This morning I got all ready to go jogging with my boys. We were going to run over to the pond and feed the ducks. I was in my room looking for all my Nike Ipod stuff and I bent straight over and felt a huge Zing! I couldn't stand up and just fell sideways towards the bed. It took me almost ten minutes to lay down on the bed due to excruciating pain. Jack got a little worried and asked if he should give me a shot. I said no, but that he could get my phone from the car, but he couldn't get it because the garage has a child lock on it. When I mentioned phone he was so cute he said, "Yeah good idea Mommy, you want I call 1 1 1?" Charlie began screaming from downstairs in his bouncer and I began to worry what I was going to do- I could not move.

Luckily, I like to play laptop in bed, so I thought maybe I could email my mom or my sister. I did, but like most people, they don't check their email all day long. Meanwhile Charlie had been screaming for about 15 minutes. I thought maybe I would try facebook, so I put out a call for help asking that if any neighbors saw it, to please come and check on us. An old friend from high school was online and immediately responded and called my husband, offered to bring me over some ibuprophene. It turns out, my neighbor Heather's sister from California saw my message and called her several times until she got a hold of her. She came over and rescued Charlie. Shortly after my sister and our other family friend Cori showed up and helped me get some medicine and get settled into bed. Laura is so sweet, she called in sick to her internship and has been here all day helping me with the kids and putting heat on my back. We attempted to get up a few minutes ago and it was a dreadful failure. Cori's going to bring me dinner tonight and Heather activated the Relief Society President. I am so grateful to have such good friends and family who are willing to drop everything and help me out in a pinch like this. (pun sort of intended) You guys are the best!!

Who needs LifeAlert? In my case Facebook saved the day.

Humility in a box

How can humility come in a box? When the box contains tap shoes. In December I auditioned for Thoroughly Modern Millie knowing that I was too old to be Millie but thinking maybe I could be the crazy Chinese lady. I went to callbacks and they said I was too young to be the Chinese lady. For dance call backs, the choreographer had tap shoes on and said, "O.K. do a basic and a falap ball change, twist, and a tapp-iti- tap tap (and all these other crazy terms that I don't know but apparently everyone else did). It was my worse dance audition ever. They took almost a week to get back to me and so I had to humbly admit to myself that I hadn't made the show. I'd at least been offered chorus roles in other shows at Rogers but my last show was Seussical when I was pregnant with Jack (4 years ago). They finally called and asked if I would be in the dance ensemble. (I thought, "Are they crazy? Did the Director miss my dance audition?")

We began with a few dance rehearsals and the choreographer continued with her big fancy words and has made it clear that once she teaches a dance, you are just supposed to know it or practice it at home on your own. We have several big dance numbers and we have a number where we have to tap the entire song while seated at a desk and a more traditional tap number. It is very fun, but very challenging for me, especially since I can't work on it much outside of rehearsal. I have taken to video taping some of the numbers and posting them on another blog so that I can at least watch them in between rehearsals.

One thing about me is that I love to try hard things and make myself stretch. (Not literally, although we do do some of that) This show experience so far has stretched me so far, it's been humbling. I really respect all the dancers I work with that make everything look so effortless even though, I know they've worked very hard and have taken dance and tap classes for years and years. So I've been humbled to be the worst dancer out there and also to be the only one without a name. (In theatre, even though "There are no Small Parts, only Small Actors," every line is precious and we chorus people love to have a name or something to say, even if it is just one line.) I don't feel comfortable in the spotlight but I always like to think that if I were given an opportunity to be the star of the show, that I could do it. This show is teaching me to enjoy being ensemble and to not get bitter over not having a name or a line. (it's still a work in progress;)

I also get incredibly nervous singing solos and especially auditions when I feel like someone is watching and judging me. So what do I do about it? Agree to sing solos in church or at community sing-a-longs and audition for community theatre when I don't really have the time or the tapping abilities to do so. This afternoon I participated in a story-telling festival with professional story tellers. I've never been a good story teller and I always get emotional if too many people are looking at me or if I have to memorize something. Talk about intimidating, I was afraid I was going to have older kids who would boo me (and my little princess costume) off the stage and tell me that I wasn't a real story teller. As luck would have it, I got two groups of very young kids (Jack's age) who loved my story and laughed at my silly frog voices. The kids made it so fun.

I hope if I keep doing things that stretch me, that maybe I'll be like an old hair elastic and not bounce all the way back; that performing will get easier, that auditions won't terrify me, and that maybe I'll even be able to recall what a plea pencil turn is.

FYI: Millie opens Feb. 20 and I'm in the Tues, Thurs, Sat cast

Grateful for Nor Dobs

I've been thinking about nor dobs. Don't we all have a few noor dobs in our life? A few things that we do differently that maybe others don't appreciate or consider us weird. I think that these differences are what make people interesting to me. My mom used to say that, "Nobody likes a perfect person but we like people because of their imperfections." I know I like to be around people who lift me up but not if they pretend they are perfect. I'm grateful for Adam's quircky home theatre passion, that Charlie reads our emotions and mimicks them exactly and of course I am grateful for Jack's nor dobs.

At Jack's pre-school they do projects and hang them up on bulletin boards. At Thanksgiving, they made turkeys and they all had written on them what the child was grateful for. All the other turkeys said, "Joe is thankful for his family (or parents)." Here is Jacks.

It says, "Jackson E is thankful for "transformers." I'm so proud of Jack for not going with the crowd and for being his own person. It makes me happy that he is an individual and he's confident enough to be himself. He had adjusted so well to his preschool and is so close to being totally potty trained. Yeah!

So maybe we should all give each other a break and rather than chastise each other for being different, why not sit back, relax and embrace each other for who we are?

One of those "Is church even worth it with a baby?" days

To warn you, this is a venting post. I don't usually use the blog to vent and I promise not to do it too often, but I just came home from church early and need to talk. The day started out fine with us arriving early for my first day conducting the music. I almost got to feel the spirit during Sacrament but I was worried about Adam dealing with the boys by himself, Jack was throwing a tempur tantrum and Charlie was working up to his feeding frenzy cry. I came down and handled the problems hoping that Charlie would make it until the end of the meeting. He didn't so I ended up in the Mother's Lounge like usual and then sprinting up the halls and tossing Charlie to Adam barely making it to my spot as the organist began the hymn.

Then I took Jack and Charlie to sunbeams but Jack didn't want to stay. They tricked him last week but this week, noing that there would be no toys, he just wouldn't stay. So after several minutes of distracting him and consoling him I was finally able to slip out. Then I went in late to Sunday school in time to hear the teacher ask someone, "Why did you come to church today." The person was my friend Todd who after joking that if he didn't his wife would kill him, proceded to make a very intelligent comment about being present so that the Lord could tell you what you need if you are listening... I couldn't hear it all that well because Charlie started talking (and yelling) like he has been doing all day since 4:00 this morning. I looked around the room and saw two types of faces, some were saying "Oooh, I hope she doesn't feel like she has to leave since her baby is making such a fuss, even though it would be easier to hear." and the others saying, "I know we can't ask her to leave with that baby, but don't you think she should just take the hint that she's ruining the class for the rest of us."

Which is when I began thinking, as I'm sure many of us do and I am not alone in this. "What am I doing here?" "Am I getting anything out of this?" "Would I be better off at home watching channel 11 or reading my scriptures?" Yes, I know that it's all about the habbit, and the obedience, etc. etc. But this is a very trying time. Is it just a test to see if we can survive? Are teenagers easier to bring to church? Will I someday be able to have a real calling or be able to listen to a whole talk or lesson or am I doomed to live in either the hall or the mother's lounge? I guess I'm just frustrated but I know "we've all been there."

Working with the young and old

I am blessed to live in a world of extremes. At work I provide therapy to the very old. The other day I worked with the oldest person in Utah who is 108 years old and wanted to have some therapy to get stronger. At home I am attempting to teach my three- year old the ins and outs of appropriate behavior and taking care of my bouncing baby boy. To be very clear, I love both my extremes and I am learning from both of them. I would like to share some of the similarities I’ve found. (For these purposes, I will generalize a lot of my patients experiences although I do recognize that they are all individuals)

They are both closer to heaven than I am. One has just come from there and the others are knocking at it’s door

They both require frequent touch and reassurance that I love them for who they are and not what they can do.

They both have difficulty sitting up but love the feeling of accomplishment when they do.

Sometimes they can’t communicate clearly and rely on my intuition to provide them what they need.

Sometimes they both call me Mom.

Although one is smooth and one is wrinkled, they are both real and don’t attempt to hide behind makeup or hairstyles.

They both get frustrated by the things they can not do.

Neither can see extremely well and need objects placed directly in their view. Correction: although their eyesight

may be poor, I think they can both see better than I can.

Sometimes they get angry and can’t express it in any way other than punching or kicking and require redirection of negative behaviors.

They love being read to and talked to.

Because they both need help dressing and changing their diapers, I get to know them on an intimate level. When a person needs that much help, a level of trust develops between that person and their caregiver.

I am grateful for my opportunities to serve and learn from the people in my life.

Christmas with Robby

One of the funnest parts of Christmas this year was that Robby came home. It was his first time home since last Christmas so he got to meet Charlie for the first time. Jack didn't quite remember him at first, but after crashing a few cars and playing tackle the Robby monster, both he and his girlfriend Alissa were endeared. Every time he saw them after that, Jack would say, "Hey, I remember you guys... you're my friends."

Charlie and Robby's first meeting. I love the look on Charlie's face, he's like,
"Mom, is this guy for real?"

After a few tickles, Charlie warmed right up.

Opening presents at our first Christmas at our house.

I really do enjoy spending time with my brother, although he has changed so much and continues to change every time I see him. I never quite know what he;s going to be dressing like or acting like. (I have to admit though that I like this years Robby better than last years- this years Robby showers and does not skin roadkill just to tan it's hide and make moccasins. I really liked Alissa, this years girlfriend. She cooks and dresses cute, and yes showers too. (Although apparently in Portland they all live by the motto, "If it's brown flush it down, if it's yellow, let it mellow"- something about water conservation.)

I loved visiting with him and he and Alissa came to church with us to help us watch the boys while we sang in the choir which I thought was very cool. As much as I love him and want him to be happy, some of his decisions make me so sad that it's kind of hard to be around him. I want the best for him, and I sometimes I miss the brother I grew up with- fighting and all.

Jack REALLY loved swimming with Robby and Alissa and keeps asking if we can go on an airplane to their house since it's far far away. It was fun to race Robby in the pool- for old times sake. I won't say who the winner was since it is just really hard to race without goggles while dodging innocent bystanders.