tender mercies and small moments

I really enjoyed this last weekend. Jack and I went up to our family cabin in Flaming Gorge and watched the LDS General Conference with my parents and Laura. Although Jack was distracting (Thanks Grandpa for trying to keep him distracted most of the time) during the afternoon sessions, while crazy man was napping, I was able to listen and learn. I was most impressed by a talk from sunday afternoon by Elder Ballard directed at Mothers of very small children. I felt that he understood some of the monotony and feelings that I sometimes have of inadequacy and just plain exhaustion. I liked the comment that the rewards for parenting come in moments not days or weeks. Being apart from Adam, I have been more attune to try and remember to tell him some of my favorite moments of each day. There have been alot and I just love this stage that Jack is in. He is learning to express himself better and better and he is learning how his actions affect others.

Some of my most recent favorite moments that show Jack is growing into a loving sensitive boy:

- The other day, I was laying on my parents couch, exhausted from a days work and trying to get up the energy to get him into the car and get him home. He was bouncing up and down on the couch and on my growing belly. I mumbled mostly to myself, "Jack, you make me tired." We then went to the market and then home, arriving like an hour later. When we pulled into our garage, I let out a tired sigh and I heard from the back seat, "Mommy are you tired?" "Yes a little sweetie." " Mommy, you mad at me? I make you tired?" It just about broke my heart. I hadn't realized he had been paying that much attention to something I said in passing. He then offered to get me medicine to make my tummy feel better. I pulled him out of the car, made him look at my eyes and told him of my unconditional love for him. It was a special moment.

-Last week, we were playing at a neighbors house and the neighbor boy started to push jack really hard. Instead of pushing back, Jack used his words and said, "Stop pushing me" I went over to him and told him how proud I was of him. He must have really liked hearing that because the next week when we were at the cabin, he was fishing with his pretend pole and I asked him to stop cranking when the fish got to the end of the pole so as not to grind the gears. He stopped and said, "Look Mommy- I stop winding." "I said, "Good job" and he cued me, "I'm so proud of you!" with his little eyes just beaming with his sense of accomplishment. I need to find more opportunities to let him know how proud I am, even if he's not entirely aware of what that statement means- he knows how it makes him feel.

I am so greatful for small moments like these that show me what I'm teaching my son matters and is helping to mold him into a good boy and the child of God that he is. I am greatful also for the tender mercies that I receive in the form of help with Jack (Thanks Laura, Mom and Stacy) and answers to prayers. I had finally decided that I wanted to talk to my bishop about my calling in the nursery and was resolved to email him sunday night when, as we were getting home from the cabin, he happened to be riding past on his bike and stopped to visit with us. He said that he had been made aware of my struggle and had a plan to help ease this extra burdon. What extrordinary timing... tender mercy.